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AAAA; voice/video
Oct. 2nd, 2011 08:54 pmI've been watching how all of you interact with one another ever since I got here. Viruses and dances and balls and yelling at each other...got me so curious that I looked up human socialization tactics. Very strange rituals like shaking hands and whatever chest bumps are...whatever works for you all though! And not to toot my own horn, but I did lots of impressive research, let me tell you. Found one I could do--showing other people your home so they get irrationally jealous and harbor feelings of resentment. Classic human pastime!
Hold on, gotta fix this up--ah, here we go. Where I live!
[a wide pan of this]
The Aperture Science Extended Relaxation Center. You see each one of those little boxes? There's a sleeping human in there, all waiting 'til the day they get woken up. 'course they have their regular physical and mental exercise every once in a while, we aren't total monsters. The system takes are of all that. Wakes 'em up, puts 'em back to sleep, makes sure the vitals are good. I'm here to--er, well. A fail-safe. Just in case. I won't ever have to do anything. It's all working like a well-oiled machine.
[those who watched wheatley's intro will remember the voice of the cheery male announcer:] Attention, NAME OF Aperture Science Personality Construct,--
For the last time it's Wheatley!
--system critical. Relaxation Center core shutdown imminent. Time remaining until shutdown is one week. Immediate action advised. Thank you for helping Aperture Science help others and remember, you help craft the future!
Yeah, yeah, you must the blink again. Sorry about that, everybody, it does that sometimes. Don't panic. I got everything control.
So how many of you are jealous, eh?
Hold on, gotta fix this up--ah, here we go. Where I live!
[a wide pan of this]
The Aperture Science Extended Relaxation Center. You see each one of those little boxes? There's a sleeping human in there, all waiting 'til the day they get woken up. 'course they have their regular physical and mental exercise every once in a while, we aren't total monsters. The system takes are of all that. Wakes 'em up, puts 'em back to sleep, makes sure the vitals are good. I'm here to--er, well. A fail-safe. Just in case. I won't ever have to do anything. It's all working like a well-oiled machine.
[those who watched wheatley's intro will remember the voice of the cheery male announcer:] Attention, NAME OF Aperture Science Personality Construct,--
For the last time it's Wheatley!
--system critical. Relaxation Center core shutdown imminent. Time remaining until shutdown is one week. Immediate action advised. Thank you for helping Aperture Science help others and remember, you help craft the future!
Yeah, yeah, you must the blink again. Sorry about that, everybody, it does that sometimes. Don't panic. I got everything control.
So how many of you are jealous, eh?
